Meal

Appetizer
How many pillows and blankets do you sleep with?
A double duvet and three pillows. That’s apparently really bad for you. Oh well.


Soup
What are you currently "addicted" to?
Garlic mushrooms. And fags (the kind you smoke). I tend to get addicted to people but don't have any major ones at the mo!

Salad
If you could make a small change to your current routine or schedule that would make you just a little bit happier, what would it be?
Ahhhhh. There's a question. Without getting too personal, I would sleep less. Time in the morning is at such a premium and if you rush too much it can put you in a bad day for the whole day! Perhaps I should start at 9 instead of 8.30. That would help.

Main Course
Which adjective do you find yourself using often?
"How awful!" is a current favourite phrase. Another is "How Wonderful!" The two are pronounced very slowly and drawn out…"Hoowwwwwwwwww awwwwwwwwwwful!" The advantage of this is that you can start…"Howwwwwwwwww…!" and run the "w" sound into the next word. This way you can keep the suspense going as to whether you are going to say "awful" or "wonderful". It comes from a story my Dad told me. In the 60s the model Twiggy was in a trendy night club in London. In the same club was Princess Margaret, who as you probably know was a bit of a party girl back then. After being there a while Twiggy felt a tap on her shoulder. She turned round to find Princess Margaret there. The Princess, a little bit inebriated, said "Is your name Twiggy?". "Yes it is!" responded Twiggs. Princess Margaret looked slightly disgusted and, turning around, said "How awful!" What a woman!

Dessert
Have you ever picked up a hitchhiker?
Not personally. Well, my friend Smith is a hitch-hiker and I've picked him up but not in the traditional "standing at the side of the road" type way. When we were 11 our school went on a trip to North Wales. We were staying on the coast in Criccieth and every night after dinner we'd go to a wonderful beach called Black Rock Sands. Once, on the way back to the Hotel, our randy deputy-head, let's call him Keith, saw too foreign young ladies at the side of the road and banged on the brakes of the coach. Imagine the 11 year old boys sat on the back seats of the bus with these two attractive foreign ladies up front! Giggling all round.